grace
Is it better to give or receive grace? What is the first thought that comes to mind when you hear the word “grace”? Is it someone saying a prayer before eating a meal? It could spark the thought of a song that almost everyone has heard “amazing grace”. Or maybe it’s the name of a friend or acquaintance. Regardless of what our reflexive thinking might take us to, the word grace is a word unlike any other.
One definition of the word is described as “merciful unmerited favor from God.” But what does grace look like? Is It being cut off in traffic when you're running late, and you keep your cool instead of rolling the window down and flipping them the finger? That could be described as a form of grace. When it comes to salvation what is your interpretation or depiction of what Grace looks like?
For its by GRACE that we are saved through faith and is not of our own doing. We love to make us feel better about ourselves during certain seasons of life. Walking through a season where your faith is unshakeable, finances are abundant, family is healthy and blessed, serving in church and being a witness to others, really during these seasons I find myself almost subconsciously feeling as if I have “earned” grace and salvation because I have been “good” by our own worldly standards for a moment. But reality is we need just as much grace when we feel like we are walking beside Christ as we do when we feel like are the prodigal son. There is NONE righteous NO NOT ONE. We need Grace covering our lives every single moment of every single day.
The visual image that gives me the greatest understanding of what grace truly is can be found in the final hours of Christ being crucified. As Jesus is suffering hanging on the cross in an unfathomable amount of pain and anguish, we have the narrative shift briefly for a moment to a man hanging next to Jesus. The bible is very brief about this man and his life with many people referring to him as “the thief on the cross”. We know nothing about his life, how he lived, and the crimes he may have committed which I believe was intentionally left out. We didn’t need to know what his crimes were because we love to have categories of sin, we might have the audacity to feel like whatever sins he had committed maybe our sin is worse and then what if grace doesn’t cover me. Most know about the men hanging next to Jesus that day. The scene is set with one of the criminals calling Jesus out saying, “if you are truly Christ then save yourself and us!” But the other criminal rebuked him saying “do you not fear God, since you are under the same sentence of condemnation? And we indeed justly, for we are receiving the due reward of our deeds; but this man has done nothing wrong.” And I imagine the most important 30 seconds of this criminal’s life and eternity came at the moment when he turned to Jesus and said “Jesus remember me when you come into your kingdom.” And Jesus responds with what I believe is the greatest example of grace: “Truly, I say to you, TODAY, you will be with me in paradise.” GRACE…. In that moment how easy would it have been for Jesus to respond with “well I know all the wrong you have done, and you just weren’t good enough to deserve my grace and salvation.” More than likely this man lived his entire life unaware of Jesus or maybe he refused to acknowledge Him at some point. But none of that mattered because GRACE.
Grace
Covers
All
If Grace was enough for a criminal on a cross, then grace is enough for you and me. It’s not our free pass to live life how we please because when you have been truly covered by the Grace of God your heart is radically changed. Receiving grace will change you from the inside out and your heart will never be the same.
So, what does grace look like in a marriage relationship as a spouse?
This next bit is raw, real, exposed and condensed but 100% truth. If we can’t be open and honest with others, then we are going to be limited in our capacity to reach others for Christ because we are hiding behind our mistakes that God has already redeemed us from. If we have been given grace by our savior, then aren’t we called to extend grace to others including our spouse? In Luke 6:27-36, Jesus talks about love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you and pray for those who abuse you. Each of those examples are extensions of grace to someone who does not deserve it because God has given us grace that we aren’t deserving of.
But what if you married a spouse that was addicted to drugs beyond what you could have imagined? You had no idea, right? They kept it from you and maybe they didn’t expose the whole truth, but they kept the truth from you and that’s no different than lying right? Maybe the truth doesn’t come out right away and you’re on a mission trip, while pregnant with twins (unknowingly at the time) and come home to find the world you left completely turned upside down like you could never imagine. Your spouse was fired from their job because of drug addiction. You knew the tip of the iceberg because there had been 3 back surgeries already that didn’t work and with that came prescription drugs and since hydrocodone is prescribed then it’s safe and there’s nothing to worry about. Now the entire iceberg is coming to the surface. Prescription pills would have been one beast to work through but pills plus any injectable pain medication slammed down a syringe through a needle flooding into a vein, that monster is something few know about. Now that you're finding out how bad this problem really is, this definitely isn’t what you agreed to when you got married is it….. who has in their wedding vows “for richer or for poorer, for clean- or strung-out toying with death.” But grace. Grace is not selective; grace is a blanket that covers all. The reality of this situation is much more visceral than what is described. Grace doesn’t protect against pain. Grace isn’t a protective bubble that will prevent consequences from terrible actions. Grace says I know your broken and we are all full of sin and I still love you. Grace makes phone calls to friends late at night because your spouse is in the deepest pit of detox and withdrawals on the living room couch and you're terrified that any moment seizures are about to strike. Grace cries with you when words can’t express what you're experiencing. Grace holds you in its arms when your running fever and sweating through bedsheets, when tremors are so severe your spouse can’t speak. grace prays over you that your spouse will make it through the night. Grace never once criticizes or judges. Grace helps you get a new job and work through state board stipulations to put this behind us. Grace believes for better things to come even when better things are just empty words. Grace was the one thing that kept your spouse alive, kept them from making a decision that would forever change their life, your life, and the lives of your children, born and unborn. Grace sees past the broken spirit and tormented flesh. Grace sees what no one else can see and believes what no one else can believe. Grace is what my savior has given me time and time again countless times over when I so did not and do not deserve it. But in this story today Grace lives with me, she is the mother of my children. For the past 10 years grace has been my best friend, and today I am the luckiest man alive to be able to call grace: my wife. I could never thank you enough for all your love and grace that I so do not deserve. I love you more than words could ever express.
What is grace to you?
Written by Andrew Lasater