It’s okay to try harder…..

We were sitting in our marriage small group the other day and started talking about what we do different in this marriage. 80% of our small group is on a subsequent marriage...meaning we are marriage #2, 3, 4,  you get the gist. I was already thinking about writing something on this topic and it was like the Holy Spirit slapped me in the face with it so here I am.

This is both me and my husband second marriage.  I'm a different person in this marriage. My relationship with God is much deeper in this marriage.  God has worked on me throughout the years....refining me....pruning me.....and my husband gets a better version of me. We are at different stages of life. We are more mature...we've lived more....we've lost more....we've fought more.....we've loved more.

I think it's natural to look back on previous relationships and feel shame about your past.  But I also think it's okay to be a better version of yourself. Just because you have a failed marriage in your past doesn't mean that you can't have a Godly marriage now.  I've had to repent for my failed marriage and transgressions. I've also had to come to the realization that I'm not the same person I was 15 years ago. And I've had to give myself a lot of grace for my past.

Here's the bottom line....it's okay to try harder. It's okay to do things differently in your current marriage than your previous one. People change over time and peoples relationships with God changes. It's okay to go to marriage counseling in this relationship. It's okay to go to marriage conferences in this relationship. It's okay to pray together in this relationship.

Don't feel guilty for doing more in this relationship.